I’ve been blogging now for almost a year and a half but found myself at a junction with an intense desire to kick start myself into a new direction with a bit of funk (the non smelling kind)… You know when you get so stuck in a rut that its hard to climb out of it again? Like when things get so serious that you feel like you are suffocating? Yeah that’s kinda where I got to and although its sad to say goodbye to my old alias of sorts this is something positive… this actually feels rather like the very first post I ever wrote on my original blog, all nervous like and freaky!
Chronicling the misadventures of insanity in the new life I find myself in versus the old one that tires and bores. I was once a happy single girl that should be a lady, I acted like a stereotypical male when it came to relationships and my greatest fear was that men get attached to me and think that a fling constitutes a relationship. This used to bother me alot and having to look them in the eyes and tell them sorry mate but it was fun… well the reactions were varied to say the least.
Lets just skip all that nitty gritty stuff and settle on the title of true bachelorette, sounds way more posh as well! I lived my life in the way that I wanted to, ate what I wanted to, never considered ever having children, getting married was never a thought to filter through my membrane called a brain, nada… When asked I would normally just go hmm well I LOVE being single why would I give that up to wipe someone else’s ass the whole time?
My freedom was hard won and one of the things not easily given up just for a Joe. So imagine my surprise when I go to the UK on a job and find a man I can’t resist, that challenges me and is not all needy! Sounds terrible doesn’t it? Oh well moving along swiftly. Jude and I hit it off immediately and would spend most nights talking into the early hours of the morning about everything and anything, he told me his story, about his two incredible kids and everything that goes with it.
3 weeks later it was tickets, the chemistry was so intense that I suddenly found myself in a situation I had never, could never, have imagined I would be in… a) falling for a man b) living with my partner from day one (I love living alone, freedom thing again) c) being the mother figure for two kids and d) being called Mama
In my heart I’m still a fancy free kid with big dreams wanting to play in the playground and eat cookies all day. Now I’m in a jungle gym of life, snot, farts, burnt sausages, cuddles, snuggles, tantrums, art and more…
Right I’m going to go kill Cruella quick, she leaves Wednesday at 10.25 and then my dear friends the partay shall begin!!!
… back… she’s alive ALIVEEEE
Right so the stuff that I have emitted that shall appear upon these pages of insanity shall include things like…
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– Learning to appreciate being farted on
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– Learning to cook and ultimately burn food, it’s not as easy as it seems
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– Creating food in the shape of animals with big butts (its one of those jokes)
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– Discussing shape and sizes of boobs with a 5 year old and being groped by the 7 year old
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– Working on the kids psychological problems
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– Explaining why my butt wobbles when I walk
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– How to deal with a Naomi Campbell tantrum in the middle of a busy shop
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– Teaching a man to braai (bbq to everyone not South African
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– Learning American (apparently I talk funny and say things all wrong)
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– Walking through London with snot all over you 101
Gawd someone just let one rip again, just for a healthy note… Organic food makes you fart, no need for organic baked beans, just plain old organic will do… they’re farting like choo-choo trains and then asking me if I can smell it… how can I not is the question!
Spirit of Insanity 
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