You know I’ve seen it done in the movies, it looks wicked cool and no doubt done with stunt doubles or better yet true CGI but in real life let me just tell you… it aint that pretty.
Merrily away I put my cold cup of coffee into the micro to give it some waves, it bleeped that it had finished doing its magic. I reached in to pluck it out and sip joyously in my little caffeine heaven… a heaven not long lasting. Once I had cleared the cup from the microwave KABOOOOM, my world shook and I felt hot liquid dripping off every angular body item (and I mean every).
I looked down at my hand and there was nothing, the cup sat on the counter just below it refilling with the drips from my fingers. I remember vaguely uttering the words oh… my… God… Slowly I started to survey the damage and there were shards of the handle everywhere I looked, coffee was dripping off the counter like little rivers heading for the big bad ocean. I then looked down at myself through my coffee drenched haze and I was beautiful wet brown with gleaming sparkly white shards of cup handle.
Next thought: Thank God a) the kids didn’t hear it and b) they don’t know where I hid the camera (for such reasons)
After it was all cleaned up I went to go survey myself in the mirror and low and behold my hair was gleaming little sparkly white things as well! As I looked at the damage I started to wonder and question that famous line… “Why me?”
This morning I tentatively once more enjoyed my cup of coffee and while savouring its aromatic flavour I looked up as one does while thinking and there before me stared back brown spots of … you guessed it… coffee!
Good news is coffee and I are still awesome friends but alas the microwave and I are still not on speaking terms…
Spirit of Insanity 
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